EmpowHER Friday: Are You In An Abusive Relationship? 8 Warning Signs

EmpowHER.comApril 24, 2015Articles

Domestic violence is a type of abuse between partners that is often unrecognized by the person being abused. Domestic violence can take many different forms including intimidation, physical or sexual assault.

Domestic violence sometimes causes physical injury. But it can also cause emotional or psychological pain with no physical signs.

abusive-relationshipPeople who are being abused often need help to get out of a relationship that includes domestic violence. Beauty Cares is a non-profit organization dedicated to ending the cycle of domestic abuse against women and children.

Consider their eight warning signs that may mean you or someone you know is in an abusive relationship:

1) Intensity

Is the person you’re involved with excessively charming? Does your partner consistently lie to cover insecurity? Are you being smothered with numerous texts or emails?

If your partner seems obsessive, or if you feel rushed to get serious immediately when it may seem too soon, you may be in an abusive relationship.

2) Jealousy

Does your partner reacts inappropriately or irrationally when you interact with others. Do they become angry when you talk to someone of the opposite sex? It’s a red flag if the person you’re involved with accuses you unfairly of flirting or cheating.

If your partner resents time you spend with other people or demands to know all the details of your life, your boundaries are being overstepped and ignored.

3) Control

Does the person you’re involved with want to control every aspect of your life? This may include controlling your appearance by deciding for you what you should wear, or how you should do your hair or makeup. It may also include showing up uninvited at your home, school or job.

It’s not okay for your partner to be checking your phone, email or other social media, to go through your belongings, or to use sex or other methods to make you feel bad about yourself.

4) Isolation

Does the person you’re involved with insist that you only spend time together, and try to separate you from your friends and family?

This may be a deliberate ploy used to make you more dependent on your partner and isolated from your friends and other support groups.

5) Criticism

Does your partner tell you negative things about yourself that make you feel worthless? For instance, are you being told that you are ugly or stupid, are your ambitions or your beliefs belittled? This may also be accomplished by telling you that no one else really loves you or cares about you.

6) Sabotage

Does the person you’re involved with make you miss important events or activities such as going to work or school? Do you end up being late for, or missing out on, things that are valuable to you like interviews, competitions or performances?

Does your partner consistently sabotage things that matter to you by getting sick, starting fights, creating drama such as breaking up with you, or hiding your belongings such as car keys, wallet or phone? These are all serious warning signs.

7) Blame

Does the person you’re involved with try to make you feel guilty? Are you being told that what your partner does is your fault? Don’t fall for this calculated shifting of blame and responsibility.

8) Anger

Does the person you’re involved with have violent outbursts or frequently overreact to small problems? Watch for severe mood swings, picking fights or making threats. Be alert to excessive partying or drinking when your partner is upset. Do you ever feel afraid when you are together?

Anyone can be a victim of domestic violence. This includes men, women and children of all ages. The first step to getting out of an abusive situation is to recognize that you are in it.

Do not let yourself or someone you care about live in fear of the person they love. Help is available.

Call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE) to get help today.


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